Questions, questions, questions: we hear them all the time. It’s only natural. Because life expectancies are longer and the personal experience of funeral services less frequent than it was 150 years ago; most people know less about far less about funeral ceremonies than you might expect. If you’re one of those inexperienced individuals, you’ll be pleased to know we’ve put together this list of frequently-ask-questions just for you. Of course, if your question isn’t listed here, or one of our answers is less than you need; call us at 903-396-2371.
Why is having a funeral ceremony important?
Throughout human history, and around the globe, people have gathered together to acknowledge the death of a member of the community. No matter who the deceased was, a funeral ceremony is the one (and sometimes the only) opportunity for everyone to come together to acknowledge their death, recognize the community’s shared loss and share the burden of grief.
What is the average cost of a funeral service?
The National Funeral Directors Association states the national median cost of a funeral details the average costs of a funeral in 2012: $7,045 (however, if a burial vault is required by the cemetery–and it usually is–the median cost can rise as high as $8,343). These statistics aside, the cost of a funeral service is wholly dependent on the specific services and products selected by the family member(s) responsible for making funeral arrangements. Your funeral director will thoroughly explain all options, ask the important questions about your family’s budget restrictions; and otherwise do everything he or she can to provide you with a funeral, memorial service or celebration-of-life that meets your emotional and social needs, all the while staying in line with your financial expectations.
How does the cost for a funeral ceremony compare to the cost of a memorial service or celebration-of-life?
Attempting to compare the costs of the three is rather like trying to compare oranges, mangoes and apples; it can’t be done. Perhaps it’s easier to see funerals, memorial services and celebrations-of-life as three points on a spectrum–a range, if you like–of ceremonial formats. At one end is the funeral; at the other, the celebration-of-life, and in the middle, the memorial service. The funeral is most commonly the most expensive of the three; which is especially easy to see when you consider the cost of the casket is a significant expense. The cost of any of the three is totally dependent on the choices you make during the arrangement conference.
Who should be invited to a funeral?
It’s a lot like asking ‘who should be invited to a wedding’: people who would want to be there. A person’s role at a funeral is two-fold: one, they are there to demonstrate support for the bereaved family. Second, funeral guests are there to tend to their own sorrow; to begin to come to terms, in the safety of a shared collective experience, with the death of someone they held dear. While it’s not common to send out invitations to a funeral (generally, the service details are published in the newspaper or online, and those who wish to attend, do); it does make a certain amount of sense to reach out to certain individuals by phone, email, or social media to ensure they are aware of the service date/time (and express your desire for their presence). When preparing the guest list for a funeral service, you should both listen to your heart and use common sense. You know the people that mattered most to your loved one, as well as those who mattered least. Whatever you do, don’t invite more people than the venue can comfortably handle.
Is it necessary to have flowers at the ceremony?
Flowers create a background of warmth and beauty which adds to the dignity and consolation of the funeral service. “Necessary” may not be the right word; but there’s no doubt flowers at a funeral or other end-of-life ceremony serve many valuable purposes including a means of a visual expression of sympathy, love and respect or a means of lending support.
What does the phrase “in lieu of flowers” mean?
You may have read this phrase in an obituary: “In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made to…”. Derived from the French phrase, “en lieu”, strictly speaking “in lieu” means “in place”; so it can be said to be a directive sentence: “In place of flowers, contributions may be made to…”. But it’s really important to realize that its use doesn’t imply you can’t send flowers to the service; it is only meant to offer you a choice of ways to show your sympathy for the family and show your respects for the deceased. Only when the obituary states “no flowers please” are you being requested to abstain from sending floral tributes or sympathy arrangements.
If one is requested, am I obligated to make a memorial donation?
Certainly not; it’s important to never feel obligated to do anything in response to the death of a community or family member. Your actions (whether sending flowers, preparing a casserole and taking it to the family home, or making a donation) should always come from the heart.
What’s involved in preparing the body for viewing at a visitation or funeral?
The preparation of the deceased can involve a number of different tasks performed by trained and licensed embalmer and restorative artists. Without going into too much detail; the body is temporarily preserved by embalming, refrigeration, or a combination of the two. It is washed, dressed and otherwise groomed; then placed in the chosen casket for viewing. Should you wish to know more about the process, contact us. There are also many excellent articles online describing the process in greater detail.
If it makes people uncomfortable, why is it necessary to view the body in the casket?
Human beings are interesting creatures: sometimes we need to see in order to truly believe. It’s a way of confirming the fact that, indeed, this individual is dead; but it’s also an opportunity to say your “good-byes”. You may find it a cathartic time where you can quietly share a long-held secret, let go of any anger or resentment, and otherwise come to terms with their death.
How can I best prepare my children to attend a funeral?
When asked this question, we like to tell people it’s best done with honesty and awareness. Let them know basically what they can expect. Advise them there will be people there who will be sad and may cry openly; tell them there will be time for some people to stand up and talk about how much they loved the person (but they won’t be required to do so). Let them ask all the questions they need to ask, reassure them you’ll be right next to them throughout the experience. Never force them to go to a funeral, and always give them the opportunity to change their mind about attending.
What is a celebrant?
The Celebrant Foundation and Institute define celebrants as “trained professionals who believe in the power and effectiveness of ceremony and ritual to serve basic needs of society and the individual. The Celebrant’s mission is to help the client create a ceremony that reflects his or her beliefs, philosophy of life, and personality.” A life-cycle celebrant is especially valuable when a family has no religious affiliations or ties to a clergy person or minister who can officiate the funeral service, but involving a celebrant in the funeral planning process has been found to enhance the funeral experience for all concerned. “The Celebrant comes to the table with no agenda,” shares the Institute’s website, “and no preconceived notion of what the ceremony should or must look like. Instead, through careful interviewing, the Celebrant elicits what is meaningful for each client.” If you think hiring a celebrant is the right for your family’s situation, contact us for more details.
How long is a funeral service?
Simply put, “it depends on the service”. Just as no two movies or novels are the same length or cover the same emotional ground; no two end-of-life ceremonies are the same.
Must I wear black to the funeral ceremony?
Black used to be the only color to wear to a funeral; but not anymore. Today things are less formal than they once were, and it’s not totally uncommon for families to ask prospective guests to altogether avoid wearing black clothing. Should you have additional questions about funeral attire or etiquette, please contact us.
What funeral services does Paschal Funeral Home provide?
Paschal Funeral Home offers complete funeral and memorial services designed to honor every life with dignity and respect. We assist families with traditional funeral services, memorial services, graveside ceremonies, visitation arrangements, cremation options, pre-planning, veteran services, obituary assistance, and personalized tributes. Our experienced staff works closely with each family to create a meaningful service that reflects their loved one’s life, values, and wishes.
What should I do immediately after a loved one passes away?
If a loved one passes away, the first step depends on where the death occurs. If it happens at a hospital or healthcare facility, the staff will help guide you through the next steps. If the death occurs at home, you should contact the appropriate medical professional or local authorities if required, then call Paschal Funeral Home. We are available to help coordinate transportation, begin the necessary arrangements, and answer your questions any time you need assistance.
How soon do funeral arrangements need to be made?
Most families begin making arrangements within 24 to 72 hours after a loved one passes away, although the exact timeline can vary depending on family preferences, religious traditions, travel arrangements, and cemetery or crematory scheduling. Our team will walk you through every step, helping you make informed decisions without feeling rushed while ensuring all necessary paperwork and scheduling are completed promptly.
Can Paschal Funeral Home help families plan a personalized service?
Yes. Every individual deserves a service that reflects who they were. We help families personalize funeral and memorial services with meaningful music, photo displays, video tributes, military honors, favorite hobbies, cultural traditions, special readings, keepsakes, and other personal touches. Our goal is to create a service that celebrates a unique life while providing comfort to family and friends.
Is cremation available, and can we still have a memorial service?
Absolutely. Families choosing cremation have many options available. Some prefer a traditional funeral service before cremation, while others choose a memorial service afterward or a simple gathering with close family and friends. Paschal Funeral Home will explain each option so you can select the arrangement that best honors your loved one’s wishes and meets your family’s needs.
What information should I bring when meeting with the funeral director?
During your arrangement conference, it is helpful to bring basic personal information about your loved one, including their full legal name, date of birth, Social Security number, military discharge papers if applicable, clothing for the service, photographs for memorial displays, and any pre-arrangement documents or insurance information. If you are missing certain documents, our staff can often help you obtain the information needed.
Can Paschal Funeral Home assist with veterans’ funeral benefits?
Yes. We are honored to assist veterans and their families by helping determine available military funeral benefits and coordinating eligible honors. Depending on qualification, veterans may receive military honors, burial in a national cemetery, government-issued grave markers, or other available benefits. Our staff helps complete the necessary paperwork and coordinates these arrangements on your family’s behalf.
Why is funeral pre-planning a good idea?
Pre-planning allows you to make important decisions in advance, reducing emotional stress for your loved ones during an already difficult time. It also gives you the opportunity to document your preferences, discuss service options, and make financial arrangements if desired. Many families find comfort knowing that future decisions have already been made according to their wishes.
How long does the funeral planning process usually take?
The planning process often begins with a meeting lasting one to two hours, during which we’ll discuss service preferences, documentation, scheduling, and personalization options. Depending on your family’s decisions, services are commonly held within several days, although timing may vary due to travel, religious customs, cemetery availability, or other personal considerations. Throughout the process, our staff keeps you informed so you know what to expect.
Can family members who live out of town participate in planning?
Yes. We regularly work with families who are located in different cities or states. Many arrangements can be coordinated by phone, email, or virtual meetings, making it easier for everyone to stay informed and involved. We strive to make the planning process as convenient as possible while ensuring every family member has the opportunity to participate.
What makes Paschal Funeral Home different?
At Paschal Funeral Home, we believe every family deserves personal attention, compassionate care, and honest guidance. We take the time to understand each family’s needs rather than offering a one-size-fits-all approach. From your first phone call through the service and beyond, our experienced staff is committed to providing respectful support, clear communication, and thoughtful assistance during one of life’s most difficult moments.
How do I contact Paschal Funeral Home if I have additional questions?
If you have questions about funeral planning, cremation options, pre-planning, veteran services, or any other aspect of honoring a loved one, we encourage you to contact Paschal Funeral Home directly. Our caring team is available to answer your questions, explain your options, and help you make informed decisions with compassion and professionalism. Whether you need immediate assistance or are planning for the future, we’re here to help.
What Else Would You Like to Know?
This list of frequently-asked-questions, as the other such lists on our website, was compiled through our professional experiences. But really, the thanks go to the hundreds of inquisitive, questioning families and individuals we’ve had the privilege of serving over the years: people who’ve asked the most commonly-asked questions you see here. If yours isn’t listed here, get the answer you need by calling us at 903-396-2371.